Done With Work!... Kind of...

Yay!

I just turned in my 50 page website analysis that consumed by life (not really) for the past 8.5 weeks at work. The response I got was so-so, as in, my boss wasn't jumping up and down for joy (perhaps because it took me so long to finish) but she seemed to have positive vibes from it. She also said she was going to read it - that, I highly doubt.

Nonetheless, this means all big projects for works is done, and all I need to do now and proofread the random documents they send me and make sure that there are no silly mistakes. And that will conclude my 9 week internship at one of the top 10 international law firms in America.

chan chan.

Otherwise...

I had a very fulfilling summer.

I actually didn't think I'd enjoy my summer this much (how much? this much). I mean, I knew it would be fun but I didn't think it will be this great of a summer.

Honestly, I didn't do much, in terms of 'summery' things. I went out a few times, watched Batman, met up with friends, spent lots of quality time with family, and did a lot of talking and writing.

I realized that in the past year, as much as I thought I was being myself, there was a part of me that was lost. I'm not quite sure what 'part' that really is. But when I got back to Japan and did some talking with friends and family, I realized that I was missing something.

My sense of self.

This isn't in the sense of "no self confidence." It's more like... well...

When I got to college, 90% of the fun came from the fact that I could just be myself without the same judgement that came with HS. In HS, I was 'myself' in a sense because that was the only 'me' I knew, but I was definitely putting on a facade of the "good grades, class president, renaissance" persona. And I was fine with it.

But once I got to college, I got to really explore "me."

And then this past year, I was still "me," but I was catering to people's needs. I was slowly going back to my patterns in HS where I did things for people in the way they'd want me to do it. I said things that I knew would make people happy, and I didn't say things when they should've been said.

This is not the 'me' I discovered Freshman year.

So.

Since I know what the problem is/was, I'm ready for it this time.

I reestablished my idea of what a 'family' is.
I closed some doors with a relationship that needed to be closed.
I did some good talking with some good people who are brutally honest but amazing all at the same time.
I will be leaving for my Junior year with some sadness of leaving my family (something that hasn't happened in 4 years) and read to be 'me' again, pumped to have 94 babies who will look up to me and think that I'm cool.

Just think: What would Adriana do?

As Nikki so plainly put it: our lives are JUST starting.

Amen, sister.

I am pumped for the end of the work week, pumped to pack and spend more quality time with family, and pumped for this year.

This summer was - amazing.

bjs